Future Aspiration

I often wonder, late into the night, when the world's reality becomes rather over bearing, what really matters in this life I have been given to live.

What is love? Is it really all that we are told that it is? Or is it just another pain in the backside? Gloomy, perhaps. 

Love has brought me an over bearing heartache in the past, like smoke it overtakes most of the sunlit landscape that no doubt is there somewhere. It is definitely not the most important thing to me. Yet it is there, in the holes of the wants and needs where my career and future prospects cannot fill.

Love cannot and will not keep a roof over my head. Nor will it keep my stomach full or pay the bills. 

So, I wonder, why is it something that I crave. Why do I feel warmth at the thought of being in love. And most of all, why when I think of my future I always see myself happy with someone rather than a successful career woman?

I wonder how much this has to do with the way we are conditioned to think as women, and how much this has to do with what I really truly want as a woman...

Sen x