Ramblings

I recently achieved a highly personal goal, something that I believed would make me completely happy once it was achieved, a goal I had only somewhat of a control over. Once it happened and I was on the other side, I of course realised that there is always a snag to goals. They never really end. So, really, I am happy that goal was achieved but now I'm running towards the next step. I did imagine these metaphorical clouds parting and I would be covered in pixie dust of happiness. I imagined that I would level up at least and feel even for a few moments that I had reached something. Of course, life isn't exactly like a video game.

It occurs to me now that, we humans are always chasing after something, some goal, and we're never really satisfied, and we're not that different in our thinking to be following that different a goal. With the media and internet ever so over-bearing, I wonder how many of us are able to really think sophisticatedly, and independently of what it is that we want from our lives, without any kind of an influence. I believe there's too much pressure as it is to find that end goal of happiness without being told inadvertently by TV programmes as it is, and of course now you have a streaming newsfeed with so many links to "advice" type memes. And of course there is the now exhausted social media facade, where we share only what we want people to see. So, of course when we see our friends sharing their happiness, we think they're happier than us when really they're not really sharing the other parts. There's also the old consumerist argument about being told what to buy to make you happy. And it's sad that most people tend to think of other people who carry on believing that money doesn't buy happiness as hippies, or over-privileged.  In fact, I've believed in that same statement for many years now, I started off as someone who would have been seen to be over-privileged, to someone who couldn't afford nice things and was deluding herself to now as someone who examines things and see if she can make them herself (with a small aubergine ha). I guess culture and family values also play a big part in what become our goals. But in my mind, family influences are a little more organic than the other influences. Even though there comes a time when we all rebel against even those.

Of course we also have to wonder with all this significance based primarily on finding internal happiness, where does making other people happy go? Perhaps it's just me but on my newsfeed I would be hard pressed to find people sharing posts of themselves making other people happy, it's all rather sad. From my experience, I have felt the happiest helping others and it is a real shame that we are losing that message.

Breathe. Pardon me for my ramblings.

Until next time,

Sen x